Parenting Lessons from the Founding Father
Although Lee Kuan Yew, the founding father of Singapore, has
passed away, it is undeniable that he leaves behind a legacy that serves
as an inspiration to us all as parents.
This is evident from the things that Prime Minister (PM) Lee Hsien
Loong and his siblings Lee Hsien Yang and Lee Wei Ling have said about
their father during interviews with the press.
From their memories of their father, there are many lessons that we
can learn from one of the greatest leaders in the world who brought
Singapore from a sleepy state to the successful and prosperous city that
it is today.
Click "Next" to see the top ten parenting lessons that Lee Kuan Yew has inspired us with, through the words of his children.
1. Teach your kids the value of being frugal
Being frugal helps you to be resourceful and careful with your
savings . It also teaches your kids to be appreciative of everything
that they have in life: a cosy home to live in, basic necessities like
clothes, food and water, and a family that showers them with love.
Although it was apparent that the Lees lived a comfortable life, Mr.
and Mrs. Lee made it a point to instil in their kids the importance of
being frugal from young.
“We had to turn off water taps completely. If my parents found a
dripping tap, we would get a ticking off. And when we left a room, we
had to switch off lights and air-conditioners,” laments Dr Lee Wei Ling
to The Straits Times.
Through setting basic rules like these for your kids at home, you can
help develop a sense of gratitude while teaching them about the value
of money.
Photo credit: YouTube screengrab
2. Treat everyone with respect
One of the most important value to teach your kids is that
everyone - regardless of their family status or background - deserves to
be treated with respect and dignity.
In fact, according to daughter Lee Wei Ling, that was exactly how Mr.
and Mrs. Lee brought up their kids, as they were told that they should
not “behave like the PM’s children” and expect to be treated
differently.
“As a result, we treated everyone - friends, labourers and Cabinet
ministers - with equal respect. My father’s security officers became our
friends,” she said.
Photo credit: YouTube screengrab
3. Enjoy life's simple pleasures
You don’t have to lavish your kids with the latest toys or
expensive holidays to show your love for them. In fact, sticking to the
simple things in life such as a trip to the park may be just what you
need to bring a smile to their face - and they’ll be sure to remember
special moments like this for years to come.
PM Lee’s fondest childhood memories include the short holidays and
relaxing activities that he enjoyed with the family. He recalled that
when he was five or six, his father would take him and his siblings to
Tanglin Halt in the evenings to look at the trains go by.
“It’s a great thrill and outing for us, for me,” PM Lee reminisces.
Photo credit: YouTube screengrab
4. Don't put unnecessary pressure on your kids
As parents in Singapore, it is tempting to set the bar high when
it comes to your expectations on your kids’ development and
achievements. Despite your good intentions to motivate them to realise
their potential, it is also important to remember that your kids should
have the right to enjoy their childhood - before having to deal with
complex life decisions as adults.
In a recent interview, Lee Hsien Yang, the younger son of Lee Kuan
Yew, said, “I think parents who are good manage to guide their children
along without making them feel constrained.”
At the same time, PM Lee
and his sister, Lee Wei Ling, shared that although their father was the
prime minister while growing up, they were not pressured to excel in
school. “I was not the top student in the class or in the school. But as
long as [I was] doing [my] best and [I was] managing well, [our
parents] were okay [with that],” shared PM Lee.
Photo credit: YouTube screengrab
5. Always believe in your kids' dreams
How many times has your five-year-old come up to you to tell you
of her dream of being a doctor one day, and an astronaut the next day?
During these instances, how did you react to her fast-changing
aspirations in life?
If there is one thing that we can all learn from the former Minister
Mentor (MM) Lee Kuan Yew, it has to be this: When your children shows an
interest in something, it is only right that you, as a parent, do all
that you can to help them pursue it.
PM Lee cites himself as a perfect example of this. When he decided to
learn music after picking up a recorder bought by his parents for one
of his siblings, his request was met by his parents who made
arrangements for him to attend classes. From learning to read music, he
decided to play the clarinet in the band, and later showed a keen
interest in the tuba.
You can do the same for your kids, too. Always take their dreams
seriously - no matter how often they change. Who knows, this could be
the start of a successful career path in the future?
Photo credit: Pinterest
6. Have respect for your elders
One of the most important Asian parenting values that is slowly
dwindling in a lot of families today is the need to show respect for
elders and other family members.
According to PM Lee, although he and his siblings grew up in a
relaxed family setting, all three children were expected to behave well
and speak properly when addressing the rest of the family. "I think
those are things that they are stricter about than many parents today,”
he said.
Showing respect is, indeed, a valuable rule for setting children on
the right path of appropriate behaviour - especially when it comes to
addressing their elders. You, too, can do this with your kids at home by
setting a good example through your interactions with your own parents
and in-laws. After all, kids learn by picking up cues from people whom
they trust and love, such as their parents and caregivers.
Photo credit: Pinterest
7. Be present in your kids' lives
Speaking about Lee Kuan Yew’s role as a father, PM Lee has this
to say: “He was a very strict, good father. He left a lot of the looking
after of the family to my mother because he was always busy with
politics and his responsibilities, but when you needed him, he was
there. In a crisis, he was the key person in the family.”
PM Lee also shared how his father went to great lengths to keep in
touch with his children, even while they were away. “He would write to
us, and my mother would write to us every week. His letter would be
dictated, typed...with double or triple space. Then he would go through
and correct the typed version, add stuff and maybe have another
paragraph or two at the end in writing [before] sending it to me. I
still have them all stored away somewhere.”
So, do take that few minutes to sit down and talk to your kids to
find out how their day went. This is also a great chance for you to bond
with them and to give them advice on how to cope with the challenges
they are facing.
Photo credit: YouTube screengrab
8. Inspire them with the novelty of hard work
By observing his father at work, PM Lee is inspired with Mr.
Lee’s approach of hard work and the guiding principle that things could
be done better. “Just watching him and the way he fought, worked and
struggled with all the issues and challenges, I think that’s a great
inspiration,” he shared.
One great example which PM Lee pointed out is the way that Mr. Lee
worked on his Mandarin by listening to the tape, practising with a
teacher and listening to the tape again while he exercised - even during
weekends. According to PM Lee, his father kept up this routine even
until old age, as he did not want to lose touch with the language.
You can teach your kids that hard work does indeed pays off by
setting a good example. Get involved in a project together. For example,
take music lessons together - and practice playing the instrument until
all of you get it right and become pros at playing your favourite tune.
Accomplishing this mission together brings greater satisfaction, and
over time your kids will realise that hard work comes with plentiful
rewards.
Photo credit: YouTube screengrab
9. Don't dwell on regrets
Life is never perfect, and there are bound to be times when
things do not go the way we’ve planned them to be. Despite all this, it
is important to teach your kids to pull themselves together and look
forward - rather than dwell on the past.
Through his numerous interviews with the media, Lee Kuan Yew was not
one to wrestle with the “what ifs” and “what could have beens."
Befitting the personality that he often portrayed, the former MM Lee
allowed no room for regrets and implied that regrets are “for wimps."
Photo credit: YouTube screengrab
10. Sacrifices is the starting point of success
PM Lee once said that he admired the hard work and sacrifices put
in by his father for the sake of the country. “He was so singularly
focused on this obsession to build up Singapore, to make it safe, to
make it better and to create something for Singaporeans...together with
his colleagues and with the population. I think that’s quite
exceptional,” said PM Lee.
His brother, Lee Hsien Yang also shared that their father “always had
the best interests of the country at heart” - while at home, “it was
always the interests of his children and our mother.” Through these
accounts, you too can teach your children about why sacrifices need to
be made for the sake of the people that we care about. At the end of the
day, it is not so much about what “makes me happy” - but rather, “how
can my actions help to make the lives of others better.”
Photo credit: Pinterest
Source credits: http://theindusparent.com/10-parenting-lessons-from-lee-kuan-yew
1. Teach your kids the value of being frugal
